“It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody.”—Maya Angelou
I wish I had known in my younger years the power of forgiveness. It would have made my life so much easier! By resisting, I was giving the perpetrators energy and feeding the negative energy, which escalated the situations.
Resentment, subconscious or conscious, prolongs and creates conflict.
Of course, it can be a challenge to react with love and compassion, no matter what people say or do, and not allow pride to get in the way. It took me a long time to get it (and I still forget sometimes): it doesn’t matter how they act. How we respond does.
Forgiveness can improve work, family, friend, neighbor, and love relationships. It can also decrease anxiety and depression, and create more happiness and opportunities.
To show how forgiveness acts as a magic salve to sooth all kinds of relationships and create harmony, below are two testimonials about the Stephen’s Soundless Subliminal Forgiveness audio (see Chapter 11 for download).
“I have been running the Forgive and Let Go Soundless Subliminal™ in my loft (where my 13 yr old spends most of his time). He has done a complete 180 in school. The teachers asked what I was doing differently and I told them, ‘subliminal audios’ (Stephen’s Soundless Subliminals™) and they all laughed. (They don’t believe me) They say he is the most improved student. I used that particular subliminal because he always acts angry. I believe that love and forgiveness heals all.”—L.P. Boulder, CO USA
“Hi Stephen, I have to say I play daily the Forgive and Let Go Soundless Subliminal at the office, and a lot of the conflicts among my colleagues have been worked out (they are very surprised how well these past few weeks went for all of them!!!). I receive a lot of visits from people in my office that just want to feel a “peaceful environment.” Three people already have described my office that way, but a lot of others keep coming just to relax. It is pretty amazing how productivity has improved for my team, around a 20% (I’m an engineer we measure a lot of things)..”—Monica B., Mexico
Is forgiveness always necessary?
Sometimes we resist it because we think doing so will protect us. Sometimes we don’t realize we feel resentment.
But when we don’t forgive, all the ways life and people wronged us simmer below the surface. Eventually they add up.
Some people may not deserve your forgiveness, but remember, it’s for you, not them. You don’t even need to tell them. Sometimes it’s an ongoing process, and it’s easier to do after clearing your energy.
Not forgiving yourself can also drain your energy.
Tip: Try to focus on the positive side by perceiving what happened as a learning experience, or a reminder of what not to do.
Tip: Calling out for spiritual help and protection (I explain how in Chapter 10) to diffuse conflict will make it easier to forgive. The person will sense, subconsciously, that you’re no longer feeding the negativity.
You can take it a step further and send the aggressor white light, love, and forgiveness, which helps to disarm them and calm the situation. I realize that’s difficult to do when you’re in the middle of a stressful situation with a difficult person, but try it for yourself.
Tip: You don’t need to get closure by trying to get someone to admit they were wrong and apologize. Expecting that will just prolong the suffering. Besides, some people who mistreat others are good at excuses and dodging responsibility.
Give yourself closure instead: accept the way they were, what happened, and responsibility for your part. Consider the spiritual side, let go, and forgive (but don’t forget so you can avoid similar problems in the future when possible). Being grateful for what you learned helps too.
Tip: Be careful about thinking negative thoughts about someone. We’ve all done it, but this can cause a negative energy game of ping-pong. Negative spiritual entities love that, so they’ll come running and make it worse. And don’t hex or curse anyone (with negative magic or otherwise) like I seem to have done in past lives! As I explained in my book Half on the Other Side, I paid the price for it by being the target of negative magic from several people in my current life. We always pay the price, one way or another, for negative actions.
As Edgar Cayce wrote in The Power of Your Mind, “For, thoughts are things! And they have their effect upon individuals, especially those that become supersensitive to outside influences! These are just as physical as sticking a pin in the hand!
Tip: Try what I call a “love hug” when you can’t stop thinking negative thoughts about someone who wronged you. You don’t need to see or talk to the person. Simply imagine standing in front of the person and embracing them (or about to) while expressing a huge amount of love, compassion, and forgiveness. Imagine this positive energy channeling right through you. Smile while you do it. This is hard to do with some people, but it works! All that positive energy will unblock you, calm and disarm them on a subconscious level, and weaken their justifications. It also scares away negative energy and entities that may be influencing the situation, and you’ll feel better.
Tip: You don’t need to seek revenge because what goes around really does come around (but not always in the same lifetime). I realize that might be difficult to believe, especially when some people seem to get away with so much. But in my experience with many past-life regressions, and reviewing near-death experiences (I discuss more about these in Chapter 13), actions really do seem to return to sender, eventually. Now, don’t start feeling guilty about things you did in the past. We’re all sinners. We all make mistakes. The important thing is to focus on doing the right thing now. Give yourself a love hug and forgive yourself.
Tip: If you look deep enough, understanding can lead to forgiveness. For example, you might discover other reasons she treated you poorly, such as a tough childhood; she reacts how she was treated. This doesn’t justify her actions, but it can make them easier to accept. She is handicapped and unable to do better; you wouldn’t get angry at someone who is physically handicapped for not being able to do certain things, would you? No one is perfect, and we all have challenges.
“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.”—Albert Einstein
Understanding the long history of the reasons behind their behavior, including the spiritual reasons (of which your soul might be a part of), can make it easier to feel forgiveness and compassion for them. For example, souls incarnate together, sometimes repeatedly, and sometimes work on similar issues and switch roles. Eventually they all learn the lessons and can move on to other lessons. To minimize related difficulties in the distant future, let go, accept, and forgive.
Understanding why people can be so evil can help. We all have or had people in our lives who hurt us deeply. You could classify some of those people as narcissists or sociopaths (who are attracted to empaths and spiritually sensitive people). A psychologist might identify environmental causes. A neurobiologist might identify problems with the brain that make them unable to feel empathy. Spiritually, they may have lost souls and negative energy, even demons, onboard that influence their behavior.
For example, the personality of a friend in college would drastically change when he was under the influence of alcohol or drugs. When sober, he was calm and friendly. When drunk, high, or exhausted, he transformed into a nasty, critical bully, and often didn’t remember it. Looking back, I can’t help but think, besides psychological problems, dark energy seemed to take over when he lost control of himself.
Key takeaway: Forgiveness can improve all types of relationships, decrease anxiety and depression, and create more happiness and opportunities. You don’t need to tell someone you forgive them for it to be effective.
Action steps:
1. Who do you need to accept and forgive? If forgiving someone seems too difficult, try expressing forgiveness to this person, in your mind, for just a minute. Also try giving them, in your mind, a love hug. Notice how this makes you feel.
2. Consider past situations, circumstances, and outcomes you could accept and forgive. Sometimes we don’t even realize we feel resentment until it surfaces out of seemingly nowhere.
3. Do you forgive yourself for everything? If you still feel guilty about something, try apologizing to the person, in your mind. And/or picture the child version of you in your mind and tell him or her you forgive him or her. Finally, give yourself a love hug and remind yourself you now know better and will be better in the future.
Copyright © 2024 Stephen Petullo
This blog post was adapted from chapter 7 of the beta version of my book Your Soul Knows, available free for limited time. https://dl.bookfunnel.com/sy4znbr1pc