Hi Stephen, I’m a 32 years old male in a happy loving relationship except I don’t feel like having sex anymore. But not just with my girlfriend, also when I picture having sex with someone else it doesn’t turn me on.
This has been going on for nearly two years. We have sex but I always have to force myself to do it. My girlfriend feels loved most by having sex, so it’s created some problems in our otherwise great relationship.
I eat healthy, exercise every day, meditate and don’t do drugs. I don’t know what happened, I also talk about this issue a lot with my girlfriend but we haven’t found a solution. My sex drive is just gone.
I’ve been single before our relationship for 4 years and also in that time didn’t really feel the need for sex. I guess if I had one night stands it was always more for an ego boost than for the sex itself. In my relationship before that though, I had great sex and I wanted it often. I don’t know what happened but I would love to have my sex drive and libido back. Can you help? Thanks, Ben
Hi Ben, I can’t diagnose the cause of your lack of sex drive. I can, however, tell you some of the causes of low or no sex drive of other people I’ve observed. They may or may not relate to you and please note that I am not a doctor and I’m not prescribing or recommending anything, just sharing some observations:
Past Life Cause
You knew your partner as a sibling, parent/child, enemy, the same sex or another situation that makes anything more than friendship now seem odd (subconsciously). Past life regression can help but not all dating situations are meant to be romantic or sexual so don’t force it if it doesn’t feel right.
Spiritual Detox Needed
You might be more spiritually sensitive than normal and carrying around a lot of spiritual debris that is blocking you. Spells or hexes in the current life or a past life from a jealous person who wanted another person for himself or herself can also interfere. Reading my free Spiritual Detox script (daily) can help dissolve the spiritual debris chains.
Not Meant To Be
The natural connection between two people isn’t conducive for a relationship involving a rewarding sex life. It’s either there or it isn’t and you can’t create it if it isn’t.
Your hormones may be out of balance. A holistic doctor can help with this and also test you for any other imbalances, such as vitamin and mineral deficiencies. High intensity interval cardio can also spike testosterone and give you a boost, but over-training can deplete your sex drive.
Eating more quality protein (not soy, especially non-fermented and processed soy– Japanese natto is fine because it’s fermented– read about how soy is problematic for male hormones on www.mercola.com). Eating more animal protein and less sugar and carbs can help. Also, a supplement, food item, or hidden ingredient you are consuming might be causing a reaction.
You already meditate, exercise, and eat healthily, so if you are depressed, the cause may not be physical. There are different ways to approach this, but the medication method tends to dampen sex drive. Meditate on what part of your life, if any, is causing any stress or unhappiness.
You were attracted to a previous girlfriend, but sexual orientation isn’t black and white and can change. Consider if you are attracted to the same sex.
Meditate on this possibility until you get insight. It may take a while so keep trying and stay open to clues.
For some people, sex isn’t required to be happy. Or, maybe you just need a break from it. For example, your collective timing right now might be more about reflection and going inward instead of enjoying the carnal aspects of life.
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