What keeps couples together? “‘A Diamond is Forever’ and Other Fairy tales,” a research study from Emory University, examined indicators of successful marriages.
They surveyed 3000 American (hetero) couples and found the following seven correlations between successful and unsuccessful marriages:
1) Don’t marry for looks or money. Couples were 18% more likely to divorce if they married for money, and 40% more likely if they married for looks.
The researchers didn’t seem to acknowledge that men tend to be more visually and physically oriented when it comes to dating and relationships, so appearance is often part of the reason many men marry. Also, most people don’t marry for looks alone.
2) The longer you date before getting married, the more likely you’ll stay together.
Of course it’s important to get to know each other well, beyond the initial infatuation stage and romantic illusion.
3) Have a big wedding. Couples with over 200 guests at their wedding are 92% less likely to divorce. Those who had only 1-10 people are only 35% less likely to divorce.
Perhaps the more friends and family a couple have, and the more traditional they are, the more pressure they have to stay together?
4) Don’t have an expensive wedding. The more you spend, the more likely you’ll divorce.
Apparently, a big, yet cheap wedding is key, according to this study.
5) Be careful with finances. The very poor are much more likely to divorce while couples who make $50K-$125K are 39-42% less likely to.
6) Go to church on a regular basis. Regular church goers are 46% less likely to divorce while couples who never go to church are twice as likely to divorce.
This could be interpreted in a different way: Unhappy couples who are very religious fear the wrath of God and their religious friends and relatives if they divorce, so they suffer in silence.
7) Go on a honeymoon. Couples who take one are 41% less likely to divorce.
All of the things above may make a difference with some couples, but they’re superficial and the researchers are ignoring the real factors that make or break a relationship.
Read the article here.
Copyright © 2014 Stephen Petullo
photo credit: Hadock via photopin cc
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