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Online Dating: Why it’s a Mistake to Chat for Weeks Before Meeting In-person

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  • Dating

Dating sites have become very popular in recent years and it’s easy to meet someone online who lives locally, in another state or even half way around the world. Email, instant messaging, video chat, and inexpensive long distance fees make it possible to spend days, weeks, and even months or years interacting without ever meeting in-person.

I hear from people every week who want insight about their long distance “relationship.” They want to know if it’s going to last, if the other person is being faithful, and if they should relocate or if the other person will relocate to be with them. Even though they may feel an intense connection with the person, there’s a good chance they’ll regret all the time spent when they finally meet in-person.

Why? Because mutual, face-to-face compatibility and chemistry are very rare, it’s too easy to project romantic hopes and fantasies onto someone before meeting, and you can only determine if there’s real chemistry by meeting in-person and compatibility if you spend a lot of time together in the same city.

Moral of the story? Since most long distance connections are more about fantasy than reality and go nowhere. Date locally and consider long distance contacts nothing more than friends.

Copyright (c) 2010 Stephen Petullo

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